Simon Van Gend Band

Suffer Well

Suffer Well

Lyrics

Suffer-Well
blinking-and-breathing
Guest-of-my-feelings
Pocket-songs
Unhinged

Like little fleas
I sold my meanest face and all the wasted time for bags of nothing
I love the way you fold your grace and lay the roast deep in the oven
And don’t be such a ghost who coasts alone and lost from all my loving
It only takes a wish or two at most to push you back to buzzing
Each day I wake amazed at what my mind has raised in lazy dreaming
It casts a frazzled light across the day and colours it with feeling
I didn’t mean to fall away from all your silver starlight streaming
But it only takes a wish or two at most to push me back to beaming

Chorus:
Like little fleas we ride on the back of a dog
And the dog’s chasing a bird who’s chasing the sun
And the sun is sinking down down down
Even the one who rules the world
Is only a speck on a tiny rock
Near a tiny star on the edge of a galaxy
that’s one of billions and billions and billions

And far along the road where love has gone you’ll see a thin man plodding
And where his horses felt they’d had enough and fell you’ll find him flogging
The thinnest wedge of fear can take you far from here and leave you longing
But it only takes a wish or two at most to push you back to belonging

Chorus

It doesn’t matter how you feel about what you’ve done right or wrong
Or what you said to whom and when
Cause at the end of every day the sun still goes down down down

Vitamin X
I’ve got a million nerves
Serving me up what I deserve
You swerve right and I swerve left
I spin round at your behest

And all the things I could’ve said
Read like books inside my head
Don’t you love the way I sway
Seasick starbound sail away

Chorus:
Vitamin A I love the way
You help me see the light of day
Vitamin C up in the tree
We love the fruit that grows for free
Vitamin D the yellow sun
Shining down on everyone
Still I feel a little perplexed
Think I might need a little Vitamin X

Causes great and causes small
Give me pause and make me stall
Kick me loose to free the next
From what has not happened yet

Juggle me up and juggle me down
Coddle me deep in your eiderdown
Spare a thought for the big idea
That won’t let any feelings near

Chorus
Some days I couldn’t give a hoot
Pull myself up by the roots
Fling myself across the day
I don’t mind the things I say

But sometimes everything grinds back in
I get lost in wondering
Who’s to crawl and who’s to fly?
Who’s to laugh and who’s to cry?

Chorus

Nobody knows
I don’t know why I get to feeling empty
When I’m surrounded by things I keep to make my life full
And I don’t know why I get to feeling lonely
When I’m surrounded by people that push and that pull
And I don’t know why I swear in the traffic
When most of the time I’m gentle and kind
And I don’t know why I get lost in the attic
With the whole house full of treasures to find

Chorus:
Nobody knows, but everyone loves
To suppose that they know, but nobody does
All of our thoughts and all of our wisdom
Are just to give us comfort as we stumble through the dark morass

And I don’t know why I keep asking these questions
When I know that the answers are not in my mind
And I don’t know why I’m constantly trying
To fix myself when I know that I’m perfectly fine
And I don’t know why I’m constantly thinking
About what I’m thinking and then about that
And I don’t know why I’m always striving
When I know what I want comes when I relax

Chorus

And now we’ve got if figured out that the Earth goes round the sun
But no-one really understands why
The Universe from nothing burst and sprayed the sky with a billion suns
Sometimes I think I’ve figured out something
The reason behind all this discomfort I’m in
And then for a while you’ll see my mood brighten
But soon the confusion takes over again

Newton and Darwin made everything clearer
And everything seemed to make sense for a while
But Heisenberg threw us back into wonder
At Schroedinger’s mystical Cheschire Cat smile

Chorus
… and through the thickest jungle hack and on and on into the black

Time to bring the watermelons in
All I ever do is think about what’s to come
And how it’s gonna be when my work is done
And all the joy I’m gonna feel when obstacles are overcome

No matter where or when or who I’m with
I’m always waiting for a bigger fish
And all my hopes are mixed up in this myth that the best is yet to come

Chorus:
This is the time, this is the place
Let the juice run down your face
It’s time to bring the watermelons in
All your wealth don’t leave it on the shelf
Help yourself to all that the moment brings

How long you gonna sit around and wait
For bigger fish to bite upon your bait,
For some sweet magical idea to wake you up to really being here?

Happiness is just over the hill
But over that one there’s another still
And even when you’ve reached the peak I bet that you will still find more to seek

Chorus

The urge to run from what’s inside of me
Keeps me trapped inside the yet to be
And like a stone I skip along the surface of the ocean that is me

Slowly I am learning how to sink
Beneath the layers of the thoughts I think
Into the world of what I feel where there’s a chance to make the moment real

Chorus

Google Song
No wonder I’m nervous
Google took a photo of the bushes outside my home
Are they here to serve us
Or sell us the illusion that we’re never gonna be alone?
Don’t you know the feeling hunting for the next thing
Fill up the space left by the last thing?
Everyone a piston pumping in the engine
What we really feel there’s no time to mention

Chorus:
And all this information doesn’t seem to change the way I feel
And everything we share is haunted by things we can’t reveal
Am I awake or half asleep and how much of this do I keep?
Am I a sheep that’s herded on by the need to belong?

But I love it, I’m hooked in
A couple more clicks and I gain another juicy fact,
But I don’t gain much wisdom
And the hours that I’ve wasted are never coming back
Everything I want is somewhere on the network
If anything is broken soon I’m an expert
Jumping to the sound of a new notification
Swimming in a sea of surplus information

Chorus

Totally beguiled I’m strung along for miles and miles
And I’ll do anything to hide the fact I’m broken up inside
And I waste hours I can’t afford just to pretend that I’m not bored
And I feel like I’m at the end, though I just gained another friend

I’m somehow still lonely
Even though I’ve got about a gigabyte of facebook friends
But none of them phones me
To tell me how they feel about the way we all pretend
Just the other day my internet was broken
Could not believe the fear that was awoken
Stumbled round the house bumping into feelings
Fearful of the hush and what it was revealing

Chorus

Be my echo
Help me to find a way to stay soft in all this hardness
My skin is starting to grow so tough, in all this heartlessness

Chorus:
Be my echo
I’ll be your echo too
Two sounds colliding and rebounding in the blue

Help me remember my reasons to smile in all this sadness
Give me a place to unload my tears, when the world is cold

Chorus

Somehow I keep on rolling forward through my days
And though sometimes I stumble, still I find my way
Somehow I keep on finding colours in my grey
And though I sometimes mumble, still I find the words to say

Help me to weather my dangerous moods and help me move through
This string of tiny courageous moves connecting me to you

Chorus

Small soft animal
Something inside of me is calling, me imploring me to come on home from the war
They’re searching the hills and forests and the fields for the guy who won’t fight any more
Something is shaking me awaking me and making me believe in my freedom to be
At home in the ups and downs as I’m rolling and I’m coasting down from the highlands to the sea
And what I got’s enough for me
And there’s peace in the lands for as far as my eyes can see

The sun is shining on my window sill
Talk to me about the ordinary love
That requires no special skill
Just an opening and a letting it run in until you’re full
No special force of will
Just a small, soft animal

Sooner or later gonna get the renovator to pull down these crumbling walls
Feel that sunshine spill into spaces where before there was no light at all
Under the moon I’ve been asleep in my cocoon but now I’m spreading my wings in the light
Soon I’ll rise gonna head into the sky with a song in my head and a feeling that everything’s gonna be alright
cos what I got’s enough for me
And there’s peace in the lands for as far as my eyes can see

The sun is shining on my window sill
Talk to me about the ordinary love
That requires no special skill
Just an opening a–nd a letting it run in until you’re full
No special force of will
Just a small, soft animal

There’s something in a mammal that seeks out the warmth of another
And the child will dig a tunnel for miles to get back to the mother
It’s the thing that makes a stranger change into a brother
and sometimes if you’re lucky it’ll turn a stranger into a lover

Can you feel now the moon is full?
Help yourself to all the dreams you find scattered among the moonbeams
No special force of will
Just a small, soft animal

Slow down
I don’t know where to begin
To weed out the ailing within
Deadly and even it flows
Pulling me down as it goes

But then I slow down, and I see you
Despite all my fear you have always been there
And you slow down, and you see me
Through the fear

Under the evening sky
I kiss all my troubles goodbye
I rise to the smell of the wind
and cover the tracks of my sins

And then I slow down, and I see you
Despite all my fear you have always been there
And you slow down, and you see me
Through the fear

It’s easier playing this game
Believing we are what we claim
Promoting ourselves up the chain
Waxing ourselves as we wane

Then I slow down, and I see you
Despite all my fear you have always been there
And you slow down, and you see me
Through the fear

Suffer well
Muhammad Ali stung like a bee
But said he couldn’t stand the training
But he swallowed the pain, ’cause he wanted to gain
All the things he wound up gaining

And Dostoyevsky said this about those
With hearts that love and with minds that know
The bigger you are and the more that you care
The greater the pain you’ll have to bear

Chorus:
And each of us must learn in our own way
To silently relate
To everything we hate
’Cause sure enough for everyone
The time will come
For suffering to be done
And when it casts its spell
I hope you suffer well

Keats said this and I agree
That all this pain is necessary
Like squeezing diamonds out of coal
It turns a mind into a soul

and Nietsche’s life was strange and dark
But what he said was on the mark
That we’ll survive our suffering
By learning to see what it means

Chorus

Now I’m not saying you’ve got to bottle it in
Sometimes it’s good to offload on your friends
But everyone has problems of their own
And mostly we must face them all alone

Chorus

Anxiety
I did all I could do
To be like the wind
To blow a hole in the heart of all that
Makes me think I’ve sinned

I’ve lived deep in the wrong
I took all I could take
I never thought I’d be naked baking
Shame deep in the cake

Hurt left an echo in my brain
Sweet watermelon summer stain

Chorus
Tiny worries bloom inside of me
I lie awake and watch the coastguard lying lost at sea
If you find her send her back to me
I couldn’t see her through these layers of anxiety

I never wanted a lot
Just the freedom to feel
To let the love of a summer evening
Fill me with its zeal

To stand proud in the world
To laugh hard at the fear
To catapult my emotions far and
Wide and high an clear

Hurt wove an aching in my bones
Those tiny lines drew me alone

Chorus

It’s not easy to see
Back to when it began
I try so hard to remember but I
Can’t see who I am

I try so hard to be cool
To be easy and free
To be the kind of compadre that might
Bring her back to me

Hurt left it’s patterns on my soul
These things are way /beyond control

Chorus

After therapy
Everything is jumping at me
All the colours thrive in the sun
Every little scent’s alive now
Coffee grounds and cinnamon buns

Suddenly the thoughts I’m thinking
Seem to me to be wise or profound
All the girls in the supermarket
Seem to be happy I’m around

Chorus:
After therapy and sometimes when I’ve been crying or thinking I might be in love
I get a little taste of freedom, just enough to make it clear that all I have here might just be enough

Everything that just this morning
Seemed to be a minor tragedy
Seems a part of some great story
Or a theme in some great symphony

The music I hear while I drive
Touches some forgotten part of me
My ipod can do no wrong
Tingling all down my vertebrae

Chorus

Too bad the feelings crest
For just a while a day at best
And then my sorry life meanders slowly on
But slowly there’s a deepening
A shifting and a sweetening
A creeping in to where I might belong

Kettle’s on the kitchen is calm
I settle into my dreamiest thoughts
Not afraid of things that only
Yesterday were anxious and fraught

Every chord on my guitar now
Stirring up a richness in me
I could strum these chords for hours
Resonating all I can be

Chorus

Big Fat Nothing
I pass the bergie on the street his lowdown luck just triggers my conceit
The love I got that fed me up and filled my life with all I proudly bleat
I feel so elite
But deep inside the unnamed dread
The heebie jeebies spinning in my head
What you got to do that for
Remind me just how thin the love is spread?

Chorus:
Everything I ever get done
And everything I’ll ever do
All the little glories that I’ve won
And everyone I’ve tried to screw
It’s all because I’m terrified
Of the big fat nothing

I see a girl she makes me hot I try to find a way to make her feel the love I’ve got
But before I find the words to speak the fear steps in and ties my tongue in knots
And the bubble pops
And oh to think that maybe she
Wanted that thing just as much as me
Seems the fear of falling down
Trips me up and send me to my knees

Chorus

The bleakest fears are stirred in me by angels carved in stone in cemeteries
Already as a child I knew that someday all I was would cease to be
And that the warmth would freeze
So here I sit, writing a song
Hoping it will somehow make me strong
Fleshing out the empty space
Trying to make some love out of an ache

Chorus

Bottled in a Scenic

Waking at dawn, packing the gear
September tour, a nip in the air
Stop at the toll, digging for change
Snowy Cape-fold mountain range

Got to be quick, so far to go
A 12-hour drive to our first show
Do you remember the Laingsburg flood?
This whole town was buried in mud

Chorus
Bottled in a Scenic like a bullet on the big road
We got a chicken in a bag and bottle of flat Coke
When the feelings are bad and the car’s too small
We find a way to laugh at it all
(My mistake oh come let’s shake your point of view’s the one I’ll take)

Back in the car, feeling the vibe
Last night’s crowd was a long-lost tribe
Looping around the back of the ’Burg
So many trucks headed for Durbs
We’re gonna be late, what’s the name of this town?
Dammit the map was upside down
Finally there, minutes to spare
Feel the love in the festival air

Chorus
(Sorry man didn’t mean to flip it’s not important please pass the chips)

We while away the hours on the road
Telling ourselves stories that we’ve never told
Each of us carrying our load
Of untold stories

We learned our lesson leaving KZN
We went straight instead of turning when
The N2 forked, so much stress
Next time use the GPS
The East Cape stretch was a hell of a drive
Dodging cows in the old Transkei
Eric told us about the day
He arrived from France and kissed the clay

Chorus
(Sorry guys I apologise, hey, check the moon starting to rise)

Meerkat and cobra
Lightly aching I wake and I screw my head on
And I stretch out my feelings and push myself along
With my feet in the shallows of shadowy dreams
I go into the kitchen to plot and to scheme

Chorus:
Philosophy, all I ask for’s a raft for these days on the ocean alone
Apostrophes are all I have now for words like ‘I love you’ and ‘honey I’m home’
Absolution and blame, meerkat and cobra inside me
I hope that if I call it names, my bad self will no longer abide me

Lightly aching I wake and I take on the day
And I plug in, I switch on and I plug away
Feeling overly worked, feeling underly paid
I live for the moment when I hit the hay

Chorus

Lightly aching I wake and I make up my mind
Not to let you negate all the things that I find
In the streets where I wander and work to be kind
Always watching my back should you sneak up behind

I hate you now, the way you keep popping into the movie that plays in my head
Please take a bow and exit the stage, the shows over, the actors have all gone to bed

Chorus

am i the worm?
i’m just a little bit scared of something
i can’t hide but i can run
the taste of love still lingers on
even though the love is gone
keep the whistle but blow the horn
love the feeling love the form
rivers freeze but blood is warm
gather in here comes the storm
am i the worm wriggling through the ground soon to find the sun?

i’m just a man without much means
like to wear t-shirt and jeans
time for dinner eat my beans
too much oil not much cream
love the city but not the slums
see the world it’s overrun
see the buildings hide the sun
all the children have no fun
am i the worm wriggling through the ground soon to find the sun?

so long ago
could’ve been ok, i know
could’ve been ok, could’ve been ok, i know

yesterday i got some news
broken window girl abused
broken life no way home
got to stumble ever on
smiling with a broken face
eyes that shine through her disgrace
soon forgotten long misplaced
elbows out i’ll win this race
am i the worm wriggling through the ground soon to find the sun?

all i ever wanted was
a home to breathe and feel my loss
raise a garden green with love
feel the rain feel the mud
listen to the pouring rain
hear the windy window pane
maybe find a place to be
the roots that hold the weeping tree
am i the worm wriggling through the ground soon to find the sun

so long ago
could’ve been ok, i know
could’ve been ok, could’ve been ok, i know

ants on fire
something to say is never enough
it’s something to feed on when we can’t find love
it’s always the same, nobody’s to blame
for feelings of falling inwards, like in some strange game now, endlessly playing

the surfaces here they keep me away
i’m trying to find my way beneath your words
i’m simmering now, i’m out of my head
i’m pulling away from tortions, feelings won’t play dead now, they won’t kow-tow

feels like ants on fire that are burning me now
now if feel it
feels like sunrays shining up from below
can you feel it?

i’m coming to taste a piece of your heart
i’m coming to find the dreams that shape you
i’m burning alive with all i can be
i’m needing to set my sights one some new shining horizon, to swim with poseidon

i’m tight as a drum, too long in the sun
i’ve got to find waterfalls and breezes
i’m bitter and cold, i wish i was kind
i’m wondering if what you might say could save my life now, or maybe not right now

feels like ants on fire that are burning me now
now if feel it
feels like sunrays shining up from below
can you feel it?

complications

oh i think it was a friday
when she told that that
she no longer needed me in her life

so i put the kettle on, knowing
i’ve got to carry on
watching shadows falling
complicating my life

i’m torn and broken again
she’s all i ever needed
all the love that couldn’t get in
these eyes too sad to receive it

won’t you put the kettle on?
please me the way you rattle on
keep away those shadows
complicating my life

i hope that i never can shake you
that i never will chase you
anywhere but closer into these arms

when i’m torn and broken again
she’ll be all i ever needed
all the joy that couldn’t get in
these eyes too sad to receive it

so when i seem to be shaken
or like i think i’m mistaken
don’t let me be complicating my life

brave ones

flashes of fire in songs of rivers and rain
there’s nothing wrong with feeling alive to a lingering pain
and out of your mind with things you know are real
that only you can feel

far underneath the sea in a dream, her loveliness lies
crawling through the earth in a stream of laughter and sighs
she’s entered a world that only brave ones know
where only brave ones go

tonight i’m going to head out alone to see if she’s there
i’ll breathe her in and make her my own and drink up her tears
‘cause when we’re alone, there’s nothing we can’t be
and nothing we can’t see

see me sink see me rise

see me sink see me rise
heavy on the outside i get so tied up
crawling up the walls on my inside
so hard i try
to get by, to get by

where’s the thorn in my side?
spinning all around all the more i feel it
spinning till i fall down to the ground
and then i cry
the feelings fly, the feelings fly

caught in my own headlights
trying to be near what i need so badly
slipping into fear when i find love’s lake’s dry
and a blue blue sky
a desert dry, a desert dry

i know i wasted your time
but how can we be sure when we need so badly
something that we lost and may well never find
please, please be kind
when it gets so dark and we get so blind

moths in my hair

soon you’ll go and i will say you’re wrong to even try
gone like air i’ll be aware of days that pass me by
keeping the strain in the days that remain
i’ll be breaking to pieces inside
but stone-like silent spaces will keep me alive

cautious now i step somehow to where i know i’ll be
when i’ve grown into the life that somewhere waits for me
slipping away at the end of the day
i’ll be breaking to pieces inside
stone-like silence raging like rivers inside

summer ends still we depend on what we thought was free
the understanding comes too late it’s left a hole in me
the lessons we learn when the house starts to burn
and bits of us float in the sky
but stone-like silent spaces still keep me alive

now i’m alone inside this home where broken voices come
to echo down beneath the ground untouched by winter sun
moths in my hair keep the sleep from my lair
but the lightening morning will come
honed by endless fire i’ll burn till i’m done

blinking and breathing and crying

i can remember a scene from when i
was only four, i was walking with my
brother and his friends along down the road

i was only looking for
a way to feel safe once more
everybody was safe one time
before the blinking and breathing and crying

and then my brother and his friends began
pelting me with stones, i cried and i ran
back to the house, there was no one at home

i was only looking for
a way to feel safe once more
everybody was safe one time
before the blinking and breathing and crying

i ran through the gate and i ran through the door
i called up my mom where she worked at the store
she said don’t call here i’ve told you before

i was only looking for
a way to feel safe once more
everybody was safe one time
before the blinking and breathing and crying

i ran to my bed and howled at the wall
i screamed and i cried till my body was sore
and then i decided to hide in my core
i decided that i wouldn’t cry any more

i was only looking for
a way to feel safe once more
everybody was safe one time
before the blinking and breathing and crying

happy home

someday i’m gonna build myself a home
complete with love a cornerstone
there’ll be no anger to shake the walls
therell be no space for loneliness at all

seven in the morning down for a swim
run to the ocean, jump right in
back in the car with a soggy hound
these boys are finding out what life’s about

a tiny thought engages me
tells me that is not to be
the thought gets bigger as they day goes on
then she comes home and i resume the song

out in the waves i can hear the moan
of the days i’ve lost or never known
but fresh as a sliver of the morning sun
i understand they thing that i’ve become

sometimes i think that i can see
what it is that’s killing me
what is that drags me down
but every time her love can turn me round

seven in the morning down for a swim
run to the ocean, jump right in
back in the car with a soggy hound
these boys are finding out what life’s about

weasel you out

who am i to say
i don’t need your love anyway
you come out spinning your fine line in my springtime
my oh me oh my
take this love and give it a try
hide it somewhere inside you, deep in your sky blue

so, i think that I feel that i need you
you know it, you feel it
and so i’ll weasel you out and i’ll tease you

can’t you see that i’m sure
i’ve seen the things that love can endure
i’ve been broken a few times, lost from my sunshine
you’re my will and my way
don’t be scared if there’s nothing to say
‘cause i’ll be laughing beside you and inside you

so, i think that I feel that i need you
you know it, you feel it
and so i’ll weasel you out and i’ll tease you

was hard to be here today
thoughts of you kept making me stray
into the seas where you wander, pull me under
much of what i believe
falls away like sand in a sieve
but somehow part of me knows how things will go now

so, i think that I feel that i need you
you know it, you feel it
and so i’ll weasel you out and i’ll tease you

oceans

oceans swimming inside of my sleep
green grass floating away with my feet
striding like a masai in the sun, shaking this heart beat
i’m dreaming a tune, whistling a dream
no longer at war with my peace

red lights looming ahead but i can’t stop
freed slaves jumping for joy till they drop
someday my soul may be sailing on the sea’s chop
and i’m dreaming a tune, whistling a dream
remembering all i forgot

haven’t you been around the bend and back again without a friend
to honour you at all?
and why, and what on earth, is all this living for?

oh she’s so much of pressure release
feel free to give her a squeeze in the street
the easiest pleasure to please i feed her with my heart beat
and i’m dreaming a tune, whistling a dream
no longer at war with my peace

love me when i return from the war
sleep tight knowing what freedom is for
it’s not what you say with your words it’s what’s in between
and i’m dreaming a tune, whistiling a dream
floating away on the stream

i hope to find the rest i need
inside the belief that you’re staying
but deep beneath the sound of your words
i can hear what you’re saying
i’m trying to hear what you’re saying

lonely dreamer’s song

i come for you my sword on high
i try for love oh how i try
i dream at night of frozen lakes
i give my lonely giver’s ache

oh slowly i take a moment to be
lonely, then i run from there like a believer
in something i can never hold
oh take me, sweetness, back into your fold

and then a little later on,
with lonely feelings growing strong
and all that could ever be
weighing down so heavily

time takes me a little further down the
road to where i learn to breathe a little
slower i take a little more than i can give
so i can hold onto the things

i need to live for freedom’s call
not wage this lonely bitter war
i walk alone in thorny hills
i lie awake on window sills

burn now to the embers in my core
i feel like i am closer than i’ve been
before but as i grasp at it it slips
away and so i stumble off into the day

light where the feelings grow
the light inside so soft and slow
i dream a lonely dreamer’s song
and reassured i stumble on

nailed to a totem

i saw you waiting with your alsatians down by observatory station
like kings of the railroad they seemed to be life’s culmination
the gifts of creation in the steam on their breath and the droplets of sweet salivation
quivering gently with violence’s anticipation

the game we were playing was watch out for love, it’s the one thing we could not believe in
standing in shoes that were cobbled for lying and thieving

long ago a young boy was ruled by his one joy
a bicycle, a christmas tree
but love wasn’t spoken it was nailed to a totem
for all to see, but not for me

it’s hard now to trace her, adjusting my eyes to this darkness without any flavour
and if you must know there was nothing to do then to save her
do me a favour, when she is holding you look for the gifts that i gave her
she might not be better but hopefully she’s become braver

long ago a young boy was ruled by his one joy
a bicycle, a christmas tree
but love wasn’t spoken, it was nailed to a totem
for all to see, but not for me

the daylight was graying, and all we could hope for was not to be awkward in our leaving
so much for friendship i’m moving along now to grieving

Another time
You’re going to be the one I run to in another time
Am I going to be the one you run to in another time
We’re going to blow on the fire in another time
Make the flames rise in another time
Going to be a new bird in another time
In a new sky in another time
In another time going to blow your mind going to blow my mind
going to blow your mind going to blow my mind in another time
I’m convinced of something but I don’t know what it is so I can’t tell anyone about it
I’ve got to get my head together got to learn to relax
Got to try harder got to take it to the max
(You know it’s you that’s got me)
Holding onto something that doesn’t seem real
Got to learn to laugh smile cry got to learn to feel
(You know it’s you that’s got me)
Running round madly like a chicken on drugs
Swimming in the mud with the snails and the slugs
(You know it’s you that’s got me)
Lying in my bed unplugged and unhinged
Trying to find the centre, skirting on the fringeWide-eye
Sometimes I’m enlightened
and sometimes so frightened
I can’t find the light and
I can’t even cry
sometimes I speak
like my head’s got a leak
and I bleat like a sheep
and I cry till I’m drySomewhere in the middle of the pouring rain
you take me in and let me laugh again
I rest a while in the safety zone
when I’m OK I shout leave me aloneYippee I’m a wide eye
staring outa my sky
living in the forests
far beyond my reasons
swimming in the water
breathing in the salt air
lying in the warm sand
drying out in the sunRecently something inside me got broken
I thought I was choking
I thought I would die
but when I awoke
I was still the same oke
just a little more stoked
that I was alive

You see me looking empty in a crowded room
you might think I’m lost inside my gloom
look a little deeper in my mind and see
I’ll show you now the fun that I can be

Yippee I’m a wide eye
staring outa my sky
living in the forests
far beyond my reasons
swimming in the water
breathing in the salt air
lying in the warm sand
drying out in the sun
Lets go to Elands
lets fly down that left once
let push through the sets once
from water to sky
Yipee I’m a wide eye
staring outa my sky
living in the forests
far beyond my reasons
swimming in the water
breathing in the salt air
lying on the warm sand
drying out in the sun

Billions of apes
Sunday morning and I’m tired and shaking
can’t decide if I’m sad or if I’m just faking
somewhere inside of my head the news is just breaking
that I am aching

I’ll consider the sun
a friend that I’ll be able
to laugh and cry with
when my new dawn has come
send me out to find a love someone I can fly with

mind consider the soul
up and down for ages in and out of control
out of control

Now I understand the way you feel my heart it is aching
Cover me with lies and criticise the love that I’m making
Somewhere in your eyes the news is just breaking
that I was mistaken

you come in so many shapes
you hope to fit in someday somewhere with someone
but you’re just one of billions of apes
complicated by the need to feel like you’re someone

mind consider the soul
up and down for ages in and out of control
out of control

Dreamboats
Dreamboats are sailing in and out of my harbour
So close and then a little farther
She comes again my friend, bringing me the rain
Showing me the way to laugh and smile and cry and feel the pain again
My house my space my dog my cat my mouse the human race

I was lost on the ocean, drifting away
Weighed down by emotion, with nothing to say
My my look at that sky
Hey hey feel the rain

Over and over and over again I get lost in the pain and I try to be zen
And I try not to judge all the ways that I’ve been
I try to be true to a new regimen
But before long I feel like a bull in a pen
And I can’t stand the way that I fence myself in
So I break all the rules to be happy again
Around and around again and again and again
I’m a chameleon again
I’m a bat in a cave again
I’m a bull in a rage again
And I’m ten years old again
Shiny and bold again

Drierand
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Four for two rand two for a rand chips
Cooldrink i’chips

Come closer bring your love to me
We’ll see what we can be
Slip slowly sideways into love //I’ll never get enough
If you want to be a part of me decide
You could run you could hide
But if you want to stick around then stay
Get to know my duvet

Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Four for two rand two for a rand chips
Cooldrink i’chips

Be soft and warm for me and kind
Ease me out of my mind
Take me to where your river sings
Strum softly on my strings
I want to see your ecstasy fly
Hear your sigh fill the sky
Standing on a ray of morning sun
Children lost in their fun
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Four for two rand two for a rand chips
Cooldrink i’chips

Woodstock song
I’m down in Woodstock again, I’m feeling 4 out of 10
I’ve got nostalgia creeping in my bones
How do I go with the flow, not float away I don’t know
When every feeling makes me more alone

Kiss a stone fisherman borderline running again
I hope to find another way to breathe, not to leave loving again
I’m trying harder to be near but I fear I’m fighting in vain
I’m trying to see you, I’m trying to see you through this pain

Today I tried to feel good, but I just felt what I could
And I could only find myself to blame
I’m lost inside a belief that keeps me hiding my grief
I’m dreaming faces in a sea of shame

Fight again middle brain shiver pain leave it alone
who’s fighting not to hold onto whatever I’m running away
From like this shower in the grey day small rays lighting the stones
I’m trying to see you, I’m trying to see you through my pain

I’m half awake in my sleep, got lions stalking my sheep
got molars teeming in my gums
I ride my horse on this beach, I chase the things I can’t reach
I’m flying on toward the dying sun

Oh I’m falling in, where streams begin
But where will I flow?
cradle rocks and baby tumbles
the shepherd to his flocks he stumbles
steadily they go steadily they go

Sugarcane watermelon apricot love in the rain
These shadows pull apart my heart feels like I’m falling again
But then I look around solid ground wraparound singing my name
I’m trying to see you, I’m trying to see you through this pain

Leaf in the sky
coming alive my people shaker
to cover the awesome day
a hundred million air borne freeform fakers
clogging the sky with love’s decay

hide and seek with my laughter
crying out love be the master
communicating loving and hating
I fly like a leaf in the sky

lying in your sun but feeling shady
settling for what they say
picture in my head of a sweet old lady
ready with her kettle on to make my day

hard to know where I’m standing
flying now with no fear of landing
communicating loving and hating
I fly like a leaf in the sky

a shiver in the morning shakes inside her
little bits float away
she sleeps like a river soft shadow rider
crying for a little more love today

hide and seek with her laughter
crying out love be the master
communicating loving and hating
I fly like a leaf in the sky

hard to know where I’m standing
flying now with no fear of landing
communicating loving and hating
I fly like a leaf in the sky

Retro wonder
There’s really nothing I can do
To keep my mind from wandering over to you
But at the end of ever day
I’ve got to push on through

Cos I’ve been wondering if you’ve been wondering if I’ve been thinking of you

You give me your sugar you sweeten my soul
You bring me down laughing and you pick me up whole
You bring me sugar mountain when I feel old

You give me your honey you sweeten my soul
I bring you down laughing and I pick you up whole
You bring me your summer when my winter is cold

I’ve been wondering if you’ve been wondering if I’ve been thinking of you

Crazy things
crazy things I been doing some crazy things
I’ve been out flying aeroplanes without any wings
I fly like an angel I swoop and I soar
But 48 hours later I’m lying on the floor

I’m a soul fighter in a strange kind of war
so ready to lose and so ready for more
so sooner or later I’m bound to win
but what a very strange kind of fighting I’m in

I communicate gladly I mutter and I swear
so stereo wide open so video clear
from hunger to anger blow by blow
stand in the middle of a new
daylights dayglow

crazy things I been doing some crazy things
I’ve been out flying aeroplanes without any wings
I fly like an angel I swoop and I soar
But 48 hours later I’m lying on the floor

give me no wonder and I’ll give you no doubt
cause sooner or later we’ll all be found out
blow me no further with sidewinds and spin
tomorrows only any fun when we let it all in

when I leave you I’ll be dreaming a song
so many ideas that I can never be wrong
I’ll minimize anger by talking in rhymes
I never mean a thing I say when I’m feeling fine

crazy things I been doing some crazy things
I’ve been out flying aeroplanes without any wings
I fly like an angel I swoop and I soar
But 48 hours later I’m lying on the floor

Mercurochrome
you gave me your smile
you had reasons for aching
but still you were kind
and I don’t know why

you chased me away
from my feelings of ageing
to the fields of the sun
where there’s nowhere to hide

I roam along this riverbed
all alone
lost in the aftermath
like an undertone
home is where I want to be
won’t you take me home
I’m trying to heal a broken bone
with mercurochrome

my satellite’s flown
my new moon is eclipsed by
an invisible sun
and the comets fly

I think that I know now
but I feel that I’m lost though
I’m hoping to fly but
I just get by

I roam along this riverbed
all alone
lost in the aftermath
like an undertone
home is where I want to be
won’t you take me home
I’m trying to heal a broken bone
with mercurochrome

I’m dreaming these dreams
that rattle my reason
and open my heart
to the things I hide

There’s noone I know
can tell me the answer
can answer my call
will I ever love

I roam along this riverbed
all alone
lost in the aftermath
like an undertone
home is where I want to be
won’t you take me home
I’m trying to heal a broken bone
with mercurochrome

What love is for
I’ve been thrown away before
I’ve found ways and means of picking myself up off of the floor
scaring enemies
scary when the enemy’s a living breathing part of me

still love aches, but it’s better than freezing up and spinning into space

let’s show the world what love is for
let’s show the world what love is really for

I’ve been rolling on the sea
staying down below hiding in the hold of misery
scary to know that space
scary when the love you feel is always falling off of someone’s face

still love aches, but it’s better than freezing up and spinning into space

let’s show the world what love is for
let’s show the world what love is really for

I’ve been begging at the door
I’ve spent days and weeks trying to find out what I’m living for
scary to know that space
still it doesn’t matter where I’ve been as long as I arrive before too late

still love aches, but it’s better than freezing up and spinning into space

let’s show the world what love is for
let’s show the world what love is really for

Ingabangaba
I’ll bring you fried eggs in the morning
When I wake up with bleary eyes
I’ll bring them to you when you’re yawning
As your dreams vaporise

Because it feels so good to hold to touch to smell to see
And I will stick around until you’ve had enough of me

Ingabangaba emlanjeni
Ingabangaba emoyeni
Ingabangaba elwandle
Umfazi endlwini

I’ll take a walk down to the beach where
Fat seagulls lie in the sand
I’ll wander down to the foamy shoreline
Let little creatures crawl down my hands
Because it feels so good to curl your toes into the sand

You know it feels so good to be alive without a plan
Ingabangaba emlanjeni
Ingabangaba emoyeni
Ingabangaba elwandle
Umfazi endlwini

Round my head
Dreams and frozen memories are buried underground
Things that I said yesterday are floating all around
Oh there’s so much going down

There’s a winding path that leads to some place dark and cold
Things like that just keep me running faster down the road
Oh I’ve got to keep moving on

I keep getting lost in the mazes of my brain
Dodging that memory sidestepping that pain
Always looking out for the sleepy shady tree
Kick my boots off rest a while and get myself free

Walking round my head
Taking a walk around my head
Walking round my head
Taking a walk around my head

freewheeling
some day i’m gonna find myself freewheeling on my feeling
swimming like a fish in the river of time
with a boeing in my being gonna shoot through the ceiling
fly through the sky of my mind
i’m gonna float away in the clear blue day
leave those thunderheads behind
and i’m never gonna get caught out by
the feelings that try
sneak in round the back door
and undermine my mind
it’s gonna be fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine
it’s gonna be mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine
though those feelings come and hassle me
they’re never gonna take the dream away
and though those thoughts come and hassle me
they’re never gonna take the dream away
and though those people come and hassle me
they’re never going to take the dream away
some day i’m gonna find myself freewheeling on my feelings (repeat) …minor revelation
if you ever need a ride it’s a minute to my station
give me all your love I’ll give you all my speed
crying in the middle of a bad evaluationchorus: i feel like i’m falling
and i don’t know who to be
and it’s a minor revelation
when i find a way through to the riddle in the middle of me
here she comes there she goes stealing animation
says she’s gonna show me all i ever want to see
but all i ever wanted was a real conversation
criminal to live a life of no communication
heat wave ice age liquor therapy
trigger-happy memories of little altercations

chorus

write yourself a letter recommend a little downtime
talk about a hunger that you just can’t see
liberate the feeling when you’re ready in your own time

warm bread fried eggs cup of tea
steaming in the winter in the morning
she was that warm

chorus

woodstock song
i’m down in woodstock again, i’m feeling 4 out of 10
i’ve got nostalgia creeping in my bones
how do i go with the flow, not float away i don’t know
when every feeling makes me more alone
kiss a stone fisherman borderline running again
i hope to find another way to breathe, not to leave loving again
i’m trying harder to be near but i fear i’m fighting in vain

chorus: i’m trying to see you
i’m trying to see you through this pain

today i tried to feel good, but i just felt what i could
and i could only find myself to blame
i’m lost inside a belief that keeps me hiding my grief
i’m dreaming faces in a sea of shame
fight again middle brain shiver pain leave it alone
who’s fighting not to hold onto whatever i’m running away
from like this shower in the grey day small rays lighting the stones

chorus

i’m wide awake in my sleep, got lions stalking my sheep
i’ve got molars teeming in my gums
i ride my horse on this beach, i chase the things i can’t reach
i’m flying on towards the dying sun
oh i’m falling in, where streams begin
but where will i flow?
the cradle rocks the baby tumbles
the shepherd to his flocks he stumbles
steadily they go steadily they go
sugarcane watermelon apricot love in the rain
these shadows pull apart my heart feels like i’m falling again
but then i look around solid ground wraparound calling my name

chorus

lazy boy
my mother and me, we sat down to tea
i tried to let go, to not let it show

chorus: i was a lazy boy who only ever wanted joy

some days i get by and i don’t have to try
but some days it’s all pain and i can’t stop my brain

chorus

somewhere in the middle of the dream
i heard a stranger scream
my heart is overcome my heart is overcome

we smile and we chat about this and that
but the things we can’t say all get in the way

chorus

hibernate
you hibernate inside your head where no-one sees your freedom’s dead
you’re causing all your pheremones to show the world you smell alone
you can’t get back the things you love, you try you fail you don’t give up
you can’t create the will to sing and self help books don’t help a thing

you’re holding out for someone kind to come along and change your mind
you dream the same thing every night, the barking dog, the birds in flight
but like to like, your darkened soul still tends towards the darkest hole
where all the comfort you can find’s in tears for what you’ve left behind

someday you’re gonna free yourself and fly away from all this shame
rest down in the fields of kindness, never wonder who’s to blame
pour out in a river of sadness, cool yourself in the gentle rain
listen to your heart beat slowly, love’s a song that you’ll be singing again

you complicate the simple things with thoughts that fly on broken wings
you burn with things you can’t explain, they fight for space inside your brain
you think you’ve found a friend to trust who tells you you should lighten up
and so you wander off alone to the lonely place you’ve made your home

you’re never gonna be your mama’s boy you know
and daddy’s gonna wish he’d put you on ship, sent you on a trip, given you the slip
and every little thing you love you’ve got to let go
cause and effect leads you to the next, nothing to correct, love the effect

billions of apes
sunday morning and i’m tired and shaking
can’t decide if i’m sad or if i’m just faking
somewhere inside of my head the news is just breaking
that i am aching

i’ll consider the sun a friend that i’ll be able to laugh and cry with
when my new dawn has come send me out to find a love someone i can fly with

chorus: mind consider the soul
up and down for ages in and out of control
out of control

now i understand the way you feel my heart it is aching
cover me with lies and criticise the love that i’m making
somewhere in your eyes the news is just breaking
that i was mistaken

you come in so many shapes, you hope to fit in someday somewhere with someone
but you’re just one of billions of apes complicated by the need to feel like you’re someone

chorus

guest of my feelings
i’m not alone i’m a guest of my feelings of fun
i had myself in a knot but i’m coming undone

everyone’s losing their soul
to a joy that they try to control
but me i just want to be whole
and not turn cold

i’m not asleep i’m awake to my feelings of pain
coming awake with a shake at the break of the day

the stupidist thing that i’ve heard
you get to feel what you deserve
and joy is the thing that’s preferred

chorus: she said i’d get beyond it somehow
but right now this is the furrow i plough
her dreams still furrow my brow
but i know i’ve got to suffer this now

so send me to the edge anytime you need to know who i am
flying out over the ledge, i’ll be showing you all i can

there’s no better way to get by
than to know what you feel and to try
honour every goodbye

chorus

crumble
first you’ve got to spend time with your feelings
write a lot of love songs to your bad dreams
sail out on that sad and lonely sea
then you’ve got to give in to the aching
understand that it’s love in the making
realise you are what you’re trying to be

chorus: i’ve been awake to all my bad dreams
here i am for you to crumble into me
pain is the best of educations
here i stand for you to and crumble into me

do i get to spend time with your notions?
do i get to fry fish from your oceans?
you come to catalyse my feelings of awe
funny how you find fright in the feeling
could it be it’s your fate that you’re sealing?
funny how it feels like you’re breaking the law

chorus

hold me i feel like i’m falling down
speak my name and stake your claim in this ground

chorus

house is dark
so i dream of days when i’m gone and soul cries to be able to run to no-one
and i can’t find my way home and all that i am able to do is long for
the days i held you so close and everywhere was laughter and leaves and sunshine
but now i’m crying alone and all that i can do now is roll and tumble down

chorus: and now the house is dark
and there’s a beggar at the door
and it’s horrid in my forehead
can’t fight it any more
i how do i defend these cages
dream until my heart engages love

so i saw her today, her heaviness was sunshine to all my sadness
i breathed some light in her day and wondered why i get so alone when i
can just call her and ask her to stay and we could wander back through the garden where we
once lay and stared at the sky and everything was open and endless dreaming

chorus

flightless birds
sometimes words are a little like flightless birds or maybe like restless herds in the heat of the day
this thing here that i’m fighting with its not clear why i’ve got to give in to feel the fear floating away
prechorus: can’t identify with what’s slipping from my tongue
can’t relate to the mental state of anyone

still i’m aching i’m burning i’m fried like bacon you can turn me i’d say this side of me is done
some blue day i think i might find my way and with a with a little luck trade this grey for a place in the sun

prechorus

chorus: you put a lot of new lights in my sky
oooh you are so brand new in my life
and i come a a little more alive each time you smile
oooh

she’s so light she’s like a feather she could fly all night in this weather a girl like her could untether my soul
when she moves i’m a believer and when she gives i’m a receiver and when she’s gone i’m gonna grieve her i know

prechorus

chorus

succumb
when you’re feeling sad and heavy in your heart succumb
when there’s nothing left for you to do but cry succumb
when the feelings rage inside you
and they’re tearing down your walls and breaking down your doors succumb

when you’re breathing heavy and you’re toiling in the heat of the sun
and the rock that you’re breaking is the aching that is making you numb
feel the pull of all your pain, it’ll suck you to the bottom, it’ll spit you on the banks again

chorus: don’t let your behaviour be controlled by how they told you to be
let your sentiments be exactly how you felt them to be when you were three

when you’re feeling slight and frightened of the light succumb
when you want to go where nobody could know succumb
when the feelings rage inside you
and they’re breaking down your walls and tearing down your doors succumb

chorus

i don’t know if what i say is helping anyone in anyway
but still i ramble on like this and hope that someone gets my drift

when you’re in the clutch of all that’s too much with no-one to touch, succumb

ages burning
i’ve been afraid of ages burning my traces away
i’ve been awake in broken moments to what i can’t say
now i’m lost in senseless knowing
and what i know i cannot say

i’ve been a soul without a hole to hide in
losing control of all that i take pride in
take me away from all this trying
there’s nothing deeper than the sky

somewhere a silent stranger turns his face to the wall
somewhere a feeling comes against the motive that’s all
stand inside your raging silence
slowly see your cradle fall

i’ve been alive to nothing much but i’m feeling ok
i’ve been in a fight with anger’s touch not making it pay
stand in line for what you cry for
come out and watch your feelings play

Dreamboats
Dreamboats are sailing in and out of my harbour
So close and then a little farther
She comes again my friend, bringing me the rain
Showing me the way to laugh and smile and cry and feel the pain again
My house my space my dog my cat my mouse the human race
I was lost on the ocean, drifting away
Weighed down by emotion, with nothing to say
My my look at that sky
Hey hey feel the rain
Over and over and over again I get lost in the pain and I try to be zen
And I try not to judge all the ways that I’ve been
I try to be true to a new regimen
But before long I feel like a bull in a pen
And I can’t stand the way that I fence myself in
So I break all the rules to be happy again
Around and around again and again and again
I’m a chameleon again
I’m a bat in a cave again
I’m a bull in a rage again
And I’m ten years old again
Shiny and bold againWhat do I want
What do I want from this thing?
And is it going to give it to me?
Where have these thoughts of mine been?
And where are they leading me?
That’s what I always ask myself
When I’ve got time for myself
Did I say the wrong thing, can I take it back?
I want you to smile not feel like you’re under attack
Sailing on the river of love
There’s no time for all this self-eating stuff

Hold yourself
Hold yourself a while
Don’t be afraid of the thing that has stolen your smile
Let yourself swim
Deep in the river of love that is flowing within
Feel the sunshine
Let it dry out the damp in the shack at the back of your mind
Let the wind blow
Let it take you any place that it wants you to go
That’s what these moments of silence are for
You’ve got to let your soul sing a song about loneliness hunger and crying for more
You’ve got to learn to set that free
Don’t make an enemy of anything you’ll ever be
Hold yourself a while
Keep yourself close to the things that are making you smile
Let the love in
Don’t be afraid of a thing that’s about to begin
Let the rain fall
Let it slide down your roof let it tumble and fall down your walls
Let the seas rise
And wash away all of the tears that have formed in your eyes

What love is for
I’ve been thrown away before
I’ve found ways and means of picking myself up off of the floor
scaring enemies
scary when the enemy’s a living breathing part of me

still love aches, but it’s better than freezing up and spinning into space

let’s show the world what love is for
let’s show the world what love is really for

I’ve been rolling on the sea
staying down below hiding in the hold of misery
scary to know that space
scary when the love you feel is always falling off of someone’s face

still love aches, but it’s better than freezing up and spinning into space

let’s show the world what love is for
let’s show the world what love is really for

I’ve been begging at the door
I’ve spent days and weeks trying to find out what I’m living for
scary to know that space
still it doesn’t matter where I’ve been as long as I arrive before too late

still love aches, but it’s better than freezing up and spinning into space

let’s show the world what love is for
let’s show the world what love is really for

Hole in your head
Keeping my mind in a familiar train
Trying to live my life with the minimum pain

Talking to ghosts about the state of my health
Trying to go out, just meeting myself

Greening my grey with a bucket of woe
Silly me thought I had a chance with no-one I know

Shooting at fish in my memory tank
Thirty two years and I’m drawing a blank

The scariest thing that I learned about Love
You dip your toe in and you’ll never get enough of that stuff
But if you’re real and you wait a long time
You just might find the love that’ll ease your mind

And when I said that I love you
You shouldn’t have believed a word that I said
I was talking a hole in your head

Infinite panic
Infinite panic and infinite relief
Knowing in a moment that all is belief
Knowing in the moment I’m caught as I fall
Knowing that all is love and love is all

Oh my love fills me with gladness
Oh my love, leading me into madness

If you let yourself believe in a world where there’s no love
You’ll find no love

Infinite panic and infinite relief
Knowing in a moment that all is belief
Knowing in the moment I’m caught as I fall
Knowing that all is love and love is all

Ingabangaba
I’ll bring you fried eggs in the morning
When I wake up with bleary eyes
I’ll bring them to you when you’re yawning
As your dreams vaporise

Because it feels so good to hold to touch to smell to see
And I will stick around until you’ve had enough of me

Ingabangaba emlanjeni
Ingabangaba emoyeni
Ingabangaba elwandle
Umfazi endlwini

I’ll take a walk down to the beach where
Fat seagulls lie in the sand
I’ll wander down to the foamy shoreline
Let little creatures crawl down my hands

Because it feels so good to curl your toes into the sand
You know it feels so good to be alive without a plan

Ingabangaba emlanjeni
Ingabangaba emoyeni
Ingabangaba elwandle
Umfazi endlwini

What you feel
At night you toss and turn you wake from troubled sleep
You try to turn away from the memories of your dreams
And in between your words and what you mean
You’ve built a screen to hide your silent scream

It doesn’t matter what you feel
Just as long as it’s real

I never had a lover coming round breaking my door
Always me the one running round begging for more
Steadily down, a little closer to the ground, on my knees

At night you toss and turn you wake from troubled sleep
You try to turn away from the memories of your dreams
And in between your words and what you mean
You’ve built a screen to hide your silent scream

It doesn’t matter what you feel
Just as long as it’s real

Suppertime, Mom is in the kitchen, on and on it goes
Do I need to be alone now, or do I need more love?
Find myself slide into the fiction that everybody knows
Trying to find a space between the feelings but they’re pushing and shoving

Shooting down the red lights, trying to turn a stop into a go
Lying awake at three in the morning, trying to make a yes out of a no
Thoughts rush by like the white lines in the middle of the road
Kept awake by the sound of my breaks, I can’t slow down

At night you toss and turn you wake from troubled sleep
You try to turn away from the memories of your dreams
And in between your words and what you mean
You’ve built a screen to hide your silent scream

It doesn’t matter what you feel
Just as long as it’s real

Touched
To be touched by you baby
Is all I want to be
Is all I want to be

To be shaken by you baby
Is all I want to be
Is all I want to be

I’ve been staring at the ocean
As the waves come rolling in
And I’ve been jumping in the water
And I’ve been learning how to swim
And I’ve been fishing with my logic
For the craziness within
And I’ve been looking for a lover
And I’ve been wondering where she’s been

Everyone you ever knew
Is somewhere deep inside of you
And every face you ever saw
Is knocking at your bedroom door
And every thought you ever had
Is slowly trying to drive you mad
So let go
So let go

To be touched by you baby
Is all I want to be
Is all I want to be
To be shaken by you baby

Is all I want to be
Is all I want to be
In the middle of you baby
Is where I want to be
Is where I want to be

Drierand
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Four for two rand two for a rand chips
Cooldrink i’chips

Come closer bring your love to me
We’ll see what we can be
Slip slowly sideways into love //I’ll never get enough
If you want to be a part of me decide
You could run you could hide
But if you want to stick around then stay
Get to know my duvet

Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Four for two rand two for a rand chips
Cooldrink i’chips

Be soft and warm for me and kind
Ease me out of my mind
Take me to where your river sings
Strum softly on my strings
I want to see your ecstasy fly
Hear your sigh fill the sky
Standing on a ray of morning sun
Children lost in their fun
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Drie rand a purse en a naalklipper drie rand
Four for two rand two for a rand chips
Cooldrink i’chips

Dreams
Always half a step from the moment
See the world slip by
Always thinking about what I’m thinking
Till it makes me cry
Having it out with myself trying to find out why
I’m such a lonely guy
Following myself through a maze that is leading me on
To the hurricane’s eye

Dreams fall to the ground they make no sound
Thoughts are in between not what they seem
Words can make me feel just a little real
But things are only real in what we feel

Stepping on a ladder climbing through the morning feeling like a new bird blinded in the daylight
Heaven is a place any place where you are

Though you try to let it rest a while you don’t know how hammering the sound of all that isn’t alright
Heaven is a place any place where you are

But your dreams fall down by the wayside, your heart’s like a stone at your graveside
Heaven is a place any place where you are
You hold yourself away from the fact that you’re never going to get that one thing back
Heaven is a place any place where you are

I howl as you’re spinning me around now
I stumble into the walls
I feel myself flying from the ground now
So high and so small

When you lie
Caught in the middle of a beautiful thing
There’s a fight going on, did you hear the bell ring?
Trying to get through to the middle of my brain
Where the truth speaks out louder than the pain

Hard luck to those who try and never get by
Who do you think you’re fooling when you lie

Wake up in the morning with a devil in the bed
Got to try to minimize all the things it says
Got to get around something that I just can’t hold
Got to beat the tree till it turns to gold

Trying to say the things that no-one speaks
Trying to hide the words away behind the beat
Who do you think you’re fooling when you lie

Hiding from yourself in the middle of the day
Knowing somewhere there’s a better way
Fighting with the anger got to bottle it down
Wondering why there’s nobody around

Can you hear the rumbling underneath the ground
Can see the buildings crashing all around
Who do you think you’re fooling when you lie?

Caravan (words by Ben Amato and Simon van Gend)
Give me your love
Gonna be your shining angel
I’m gonna do what I’m able
To be as able as I can
As able as I can
As able as I can
As able as I can

Let me inside
Let me live my life beside you
Let my love misguide you
Slide you with my plan
I’m a gonna backslide you with my plan
Slide you with my plan
I’m a gonna backslide you with my plan

‘Cos I’ve got love
More love than I can stand
And I’ve got hope
More hope than any man
Step into my caravan

Give me a sign
Make like you need me near you
Give me something to adhere to
And I’ll cooperate
I’ll cooperate
I’ll cooperate
I’ll cooperate

Tell me something
Don’t just say you’re OK
Tell me everything you love now
And everything you hate
Every little thing you hate
Everything you hate
Every little thing you hate

‘Cos I’ve got love
More love than I can stand
And I’ve got hope
More hope than any man
Step into my caravan

Bidibidi bim ba-a-ah….

Another time
You’re going to be the one I run to in another time
Am I going to be the one you run to in another time
We’re going to blow on the fire in another time
Make the flames rise in another time
Going to be a new bird in another time
In a new sky in another time

In another time going to blow your mind going to blow my mind
going to blow your mind going to blow my mind in another time

I’m convinced of something but I don’t know what it is so I can’t tell anyone about it

I’ve got to get my head together got to learn to relax
Got to try harder got to take it to the max
(You know it’s you that’s got me)
Holding onto something that doesn’t seem real
Got to learn to laugh smile cry got to learn to feel
(You know it’s you that’s got me)
Running round madly like a chicken on drugs
Swimming in the mud with the snails and the slugs
(You know it’s you that’s got me)
Lying in my bed unplugged and unhinged
Trying to find the centre, skirting on the fringe

Lazy boy
my mother and me, we sat down to tea
i tried to let go, to not let it show

chorus: i was a lazy boy who only ever wanted joy

some days i get by and i don’t have to try
but some days it’s all pain and i can’t stop my brain

chorus

somewhere in the middle of the dream
i heard a stranger scream
my heart is overcome my heart is overcome

we smile and we chat about this and that
but the things we can’t say all get in the way

chorus.

Find the smile (words and music by Ben Amato)
Why when I go out
Do I just need to be alone?
Why when I’m alone
Do I go crazy in my zone?

I’m just a dustbin full of urges
I try to stay afloat
I keep my goodness in control
No mutiny in my boat

Why do I seem happy
When I’m screaming to be burned?
Where do I find the smile?

Where’s the reason where’s the sense
Where’s the cause and consequence
Where’s the feeling where’s the hate
All I can do is contemplate

I’m just a dustbin full of urges
I try to stay afloat
I keep my goodness in control
No mutiny in my boat